Importance of Closures

I am going to write about importance of closure in human bonds not closer :P.

Closer is when have a closed linked bond with someone who is close to you. I am talking about endings. Often in human emotions the importance of this closure is neglected by people.

I faced this in my own life as well, by closure i mean that approach where both the individuals or people involved have a open conversation and without judging or blaming someone. A talk at a high maturity level where both do understand each other point of views. Improper closures leads to loads of residual feelings and resentments. A reminiscing memory is always better then a resentment.

Closure helps to enhance each person personal improvement as it helps each person to move on easily.

I had a friend who was seeing a guy for an year he visited her place and spend time and then she went to drop him in airport the moment he boarded the flight he messaged her  “you are beautiful soul and i am an asshole i dont want to screw up your life have a great day lets end it”.

Well was it a closure it was a command, how can people be so coward and not end things by discussing or explaining. She was broken and called me and was crying a  girl whom i never saw crying in so many years the girl who probably always motivated me when i needed a dose of positivity was crying. I consoled her and said its his loss, he a coward who didn’t have guts to even face you boldly because he himself knows he never gave his 100%.She was blaming herself and was in self pity that i might have lacked something that the one who was with me 12 hrs back laughing and no more here. I said dont get in the phase of self pity i know it hurts when we decide to break a bond it can be even  a friendship or when we leave a company.

We human are so selfish that when things doesn’t go our way we get frustrated and instead of speaking our heart out and be honest and give a proper explanation to the other individual who was also a part of the bond we share we leave with too many questions in the other person mind and that leads to frustration, self doubt, self pity in the mind of other person.

At time it happens due to lack of communication the one who breaks can easily move on because they know the reasons and the one who is heart broken stays in confusion that what went wrong.

I know every time situation is different,perception driven etc, but one thing probably you can do when you could share your happiness and beautiful time with that individual why cnt you tell the reason for separation also like with a proper explanation and making the person understand rather then saying result matters. result matter true, but it cnt be just from your point of view atleast the person should know the vision by which you decided because every individual way of looking at things is different for you a riddle is something you cnt handle and for that person its easy like a cake walk. You never know. 

Leaving human emotions in haywire does harm to both especially the one who is broken there heart because of the thousand question marks and exclamatory marks they had been left with to solve. It hurts so much  that they find it a struggle to move on in spite they try there best.

I completely agree there are people who cnt take rejections and they probably will  blame you scream at you etc but it is wise everyone has there own frustrations it will vent out which is much better then holding to grudges or confusions.If the other person is mentally sick then i wont tell you  to go ahead and have a talk because that individual wont understand as they are obsessed but someone who is ready to accept and is matured for a productive conversation then why not give  try. 

You never know when in life you probably have to face this person again and that time rather feeling embarrassed to have a conversation you should be able to just say hi and say thanks and greet each other TRUST BE THAT FEELING IS BLISSFUL and you both can have a laugh together.

I had a very close friend due to some misunderstanding we both parted, the fault was on my end for not doing a closure and it kept haunting me for years that if i could have given the explanation. I did it after many years and trust me it helped to me at least i could be at peace and so my friend and today we are great friends again.

Never leave thing sin haywire, i strongly believe in closures ok you cnt talk now but probably you can at a later phase when you in better emotional stable level. when you leave someone without any proper explanation and suddenly you connect out of blue moon the person will be angry or get a hope that why suddenly is it because the person is missing me  etc again a wrong hope and again the wrong circle and out of our own egos we dont talk openly about it. I would urge people move on from those who the faster you can because its the question of self worth, you cnt let someone treat you the way they want whenever they feel they can connect and close. Never give this control to anyone give this to self and believe me you will be at peace. Also i feel the act of unblocking and blocking as immature when you block someone you show how weak you are in front of that individual.

P.S This piece of advice was solely to that one individual who broke my closest pal heart. I wish dude you had balls to tell looking at her eyes or gave a call then just a text of one liner. But nevertheless she is doing extremely well and rocking in the film industry the way she was before and much happier and good she didn’t choose you to be her life partner.

 

 

 

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